Our youngest son has been battling a health issue recently and currently. It has made me pray more diligently, read more devotionals, feel the love of Jesus through the hands and minds of medical staff, friends, and family. I see my husband as a source of humor, tough love, tender love, and encouragement. We have received yield hearts.
As a person that struggles with anxiety and depression there isn’t any medicine in the world that can take away the fear and sadness one sees when their child is very sick. Medicines can temper but not fix one’s mental state. But as I yielded my heart to this situation I have peace.
However, I sense his anxiety too. He cries, he moans, he picks at his wounds, and has had moments of talking less or not at all. At moments he will play or watch movies, and at other times he prefers to do nothing. He has to have a yielded heart as he points to us, holds our hands, or requests a Facetime session with our whole family including his brother.
A definition of “yielded” that most applies to this situation: to give way under force or pressure. Our family has been under pressure this week. The medical staff feels the same pressure. Yielded means to give way…to give way for Christ to sustain and heal us.
Luke 12:16 And he told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man yielded an abundant harvest.
You are our force of love and light. Thank you for always being with us. Forgive us when we doubt your power or feel our prayers are not being answered. Please heal our son completely and help us as parents apply kind pressure to help him do the hard things he needs to do in order to get well. Amen.
The people we love or those who care about us contact us. In my opinion these are members of “the church”…the body of believers that surround one another in care and attention. This week has been a rough one, but “the church” has shown up…
The friends who text to see how I’m doing or ask for my advice.
The family members who send you gifts to brighten you and your sick child’s day.
The prayers from people who know us well and those we have just met that are willing to cry out to God on our behalf.
The nurses and doctors who are sensitive, hard working, and kind.
The spouse who centers you, supports you and your family, and prayers over us through an emotional hug.
The hug from a child. The courage of our sons.
The call from a member of the church to check in on how your family is doing.
This is the church. These are the people I’m thankful for this week.
Genesis 8:9 But the dove could find nowhere to perch because there was water over all the surface of the earth; so it returned to Noah in the ark. He reached out his hand and took the dove and brought it back to himself in the ark.
Five Minute Friday is a group of writers who connect over personal posts that have taken them 5 minutes to create. You can visit this week’s linkup here.
Recently I have felt like that dove mentioned above in Genesis. I look for ways to perch or settle my being all around me, but I ultimately have to return to my Master, Our Lord. I have to pray. I have to read a devotional from my inbox from other Christian women. The world doesn’t seem to exactly have a place I can land.
Once I return to time in quiet with the Holy Spirit infusion, I feel more ready to fly out into the world and look again for a spot to perch. I sometimes don’t like the spot I find, but I press on to fly new places. I feel like the days’ pressures mount and only in moments of rest do I find renewal.
What about you? Where do you find rest? Renewal?
We have a safe place in Your presences. You can be our Ark. You can be our sanctuary. I don’t always pause. I’m working on it. It helps when I do. I pray that I find continued spaces in day for visits.
The tears come. I may not know why, and other times I know exactly why. Last week they fell in response to someone else crying. Someone hurting brings empathy. I also had a moment when tears fell out differently due to fear. I was afraid of something that may or may occur. And again, the tears fell in response to a silly topic that seemed stressful. The tears come.
I feel drained after and later released after the tears come. I know that tears are temporary and a part of life and a human response to situations and emotions. I appreciate the people who are willing to come alongside me even when the tears come. God is also there with His Holy Spirit holding us.
Be with me. Comfort me. Strengthen me. Love me when tears come.
Last night I woke up at 12:45 to use the bathroom and I could still hear my son’s voice on his computer chat with friends on an online game. I hurried out to his computer and got his attention saying, “You need to wrap it up. It’s 12:45 and I can hear you.” I returned to my darkened bedroom to realize my husband wasn’t there. I found him in our home office watching a show/movie on his ipad also with headphones. “What are you guys doing?”
I was angry. My sleep had been disrupted. Our son doesn’t need to be staying up that late…he’s had trouble adjusting to the new sleep patterns of the new school year. My husband didn’t notice what was what going on so then I was mad at him. Which I shouldn’t be mad, because he’s an adult and can do what makes him happy in the evenings. I’m an early to bed early to rise. We are just different, and that is okay.
Parenting is hard, but it is better when their are two different angles at play. My husband and I can balance things out and bring different things to the table. We usually do a good job on compromising and eventually present a united front. “It’s going to be okay,” he reassured me last night. And he tickled my back to help me return to sleep. Below you’ll find some parenting quotes that I rather liked:
This is a post for the Five Minute Friday community of writers. I wrote earlier this morning a different post, but right now I write again. Five minutes on the word “RIGHT”…GO!
Right now I feel better. About a half hour ago I woke kind of sleepy and with a headache. With some peppermint oil sniffing and a cup of hot black tea and honey plus some quiet time with Godly devotionals and blog writing the headache is gone.
I wrote a letter to our middle school son this morning on my previous blog post. I had written one earlier this week to our high school son. I get very sentimental at the start of school and at their birthdays. My blog is a family and faith journal of sorts.
This morning the blog post I wrote earlier put me into tears. It is emotional writing words to encourage your son and likewise reflecting on how they are growing and not so little anymore. This seems like a big year for our sons. One goes to the first year of middle school and the other to the first year of high school.
Right now I’ve chosen to stay home again as a stay at home mom and wife. I want to be there for our sons as they come and go to school and help my aging parents some during the days. Right now I’m nervous on how I will truly fill my days as so many have been with our whole family the past several months. Right now I’ll enjoy today as our final week day of summer.
Next week you enter middle school. You continue to grow up into an amazing boy! It seems like yesterday you were a baby and then a toddler who I pushed around in a stroller. Now you are in the 6th grade! I love your smile, your laughter, your kindness to others, and the way you are always thinking hard about things.
Middle school will be an adjustment. Learning a bigger school campus and taking care of 7 periods of homework will be hard at times. I know you can do it! I will be here to help you with your homework and staying organized if you need me.
I pray that you know how much God loves you.
“Let us love one another, for love is of God.” 1 John 4:7
He designed you for being a light in this world. Kids will be needing friends this year, and you will too. Pick your friends wisely. Shine bright as a person who is thoughtful, loving, and encouraging to others. Have fun too!
I love you so very much and plan to continue giving you lots of mom hugs!
func·tion·al/ˈfəNG(k)SH(ə)n(ə)l/ adj.: of or having a special activity, purpose, or task; relating to the way in which something works or operates. of or relating to a variable quantity whose value depends on one or more other variables.